Pages of Love

I’ve been watching Korean and Chinese dramas for a while now. If I’m watching a show, you’ll most likely find me on the Viki app, IQIYI or Youtube. Those of us who enjoy watching these dramas are a special type of people. Our best quality is the ability to multitask: read subtitles, listen to a foreign language and repeating common phrases outside of watching the show. Many people can’t comprehend our love for Korean and Chinese dramas, and that’s okay. But today’s not about them understand us. Today I want to write about the anticipation and absolute joy of a kiss between our leads.

Most American tv shows has kissing and sex scenes within the first five episodes. Boring!

But for Asian dramas, you’ll get an indirect kiss, accidental kiss and surprise kiss before you get a real kiss.

I do believe the main reason why it’s so appealing is that even though this genre is growing outside of Asia, they stay true to their culture. Watching these shows have taught me that, you don’t hug someone of the opposite sex if you’re together. Your “anniversary” or Day 1 of dating comes after being pursed, when you accept the other person’s confession. Holding hands is the equivalent of posting your significant other on social media or changing your Facebook status.

As fans, we are willing to go through the ride with the characters in the show. From the classic, oops I’m clumsy so I’m going to fall on you and somehow end up kissing you. To the deep stare that could lead into a kiss because they’re both ready for it, but they get interrupted. The second lead, behaving like they would ever be the main lead causing the main lead to finally take action and claim his partner.

The parents disagree, the jealous fake friend, the miscommunication, the family struggles, the car accidents, the money hungry person. All laying the foundation to the couples realizing what they mean to each other.

I recently finished this show where the female lead removed the eye glasses of the male lead character and I said to myself, whoah! that is INTIMACY. Now, for those of us who wear glasses, have you ever let someone take off your glasses for you? Probably, most likely not. It’s such a small thing but it represents trust.

Some people will roll their eyes and say that these dramas are unrealistic and it feeds into our delusions. But I disagree. Am I gonna walk out the house without checking the weather and have you appear with an open umbrella when it suddenly rains? No, my main bag has an umbrella in it, so you’ll never catch me lacking. Do I need you to tie my shoes for me? No, but the act of lowering yourself before your partner is a sign of trust, submission and respect.

All these things, the anticipation, all makes the kiss worth it. Because when they do finally kiss, it’s not simply backed by lust. The kiss means that they genuinely like each other, they understand each other’s character, they know each other. They have decided that this is their person.

Now before someone comes for me, does that mean they have the formula to finding your life partner? No. However, these shows help strengthen values. In this hookup culture that we live in, sex isn’t seen as a big deal, kissing isn’t seen as intimate. But if you ever have the pleasure of watching these shows, you understand that, your lips are valuable. You’re valuable. Not every good looking guy should have access to you. Just because a man looks at you, does not mean they’re interested in truly knowing you. You are a treasure, you’re special.

If you’re still single, practice acts of non-sexual intimacy with the person you’re exploring things with. Cooking dinner for each other, dancing at home, braiding the other’s hair, learning about the things that interest them.

I truly believe that I will know the right man for me base on our kiss. With my last relationship, I ignored the warning signs that popped up. I thought it was time. Nevertheless, know that for us drama fans, we’re not hyping a kiss scene because we’re deprived. Rather, we understand the journey that our characters took to get to a kiss.