Why we scream on roller coasters

It’s a total lack of trust

So here’s what happened, during my birthday week celebration my parents went on their first roller coaster ride. After the ride my dad said “I thought I was gonna fall, but after the first dip I didn’t fall and I knew I would be okay.”

Fast forward to tonight, I just watched “nobody’s fool” with my sisters and it hit me. (Tipsy mind working). We scream because we don’t trust that we won’t fall or we think that somewhere long the ride something will go wrong and we won’t be able to recover from the damage.

Sort of like when people get hurt and then decide to get back out there. You know you want to move on (get on that roller coaster), you know you’ve pre-vetted the guy or girl (checked to make sure you’re truly strapped in) but you still scream when the ride goes down on turns a corner too fast or goes backwards at top speed. You get scared when things start to go wrong, a.k.a your first disagreement/argument.

Here’a how “Nobody’s Fool” ties in. Danica (Tika Sumpter) is heartbroken over her ex-fiance dumping her and moving on. Even though Danica’s been hurt she still wants to find love, she wants someone who matches everything on her “list.” (Lists don’t work ladies/gents). Charlie (the guy she’s never met but has been dating for a year) seems like the perfect guy. He checks everything off her list while Frank (Omari Chadwick) is someone she could never see herself associated with. Of course, predictable we know who she ends up with.

However, during the movie Danica “harmlessly” flirted with Frank while she was dating Charlie. (She didn’t want to admit that she had a thing for Frank). As she gets to know more about Frank (who she actually sees regularly) she becomes blinded by his flaws and imperfections (things that aren’t on her list). But, he’s great in bed so she keeps him around until she finally meets Charlie. Danica drops Frank like hot potatoes to be with the guy who matches everything on her “list”. Finds out, Charlie isn’t the guy for her but she was so stuck on that list that she couldn’t see Frank for what he was.

Danica’s list was her safety net or in this case “pre-vetting” process. Frank is clearly the roller coaster, he takes turns with her that feel unexpected and because it doesn’t fit her “plan” for her life she tries to fall back.

What am I getting at? Trust yourself to make the right decision for YOU. Let go and enjoy the twist and turns of your partner, it builds character. I am not saying to stay with an asshole or jerk or disrespectful person. But don’t dismiss someone simply because they don’t fit in your box.

Current Situation

 

I mean I think I have every right to be afraid

Afraid because of all my past experiences

I know it’s wrong to prejudge a relationship based on the past

But how can I not when

One says he loves me then cheats on me

Another says he loves me but not as much as he’ll love someone else

And another says he loves me but can’t handle me so he walks away

They all talk a good game in the beginning

But then shit turns sideways

And all of a sudden you gotta let go

Cause it’s getting too much…

So yeah I’m afraid but I’m also tired

Tired of being cast aside

Tired of being loved halfway

Tired of giving my all and getting a portion in return

Tired of being told I love you

When in the end they all walk away

I’m tired, I am tired, I am so tired of losing myself

So yeah imma sit back I’ll focus on God, focus on me

And if you think you can walk into my life

And stay no matter what comes our way

Then welcome, if not then Let’s stick to the friendship

Waiting..

When we first started talking

I didn’t think it would get serious

And when things switched from casual

I prayed

I asked God

“Please let him be my last”

I thought maybe if I asked

It would come true

Playing myself like I was wishing upon a star

When I just needed to wait

So when he asked I said yes

Regretting those words with my next breath

Now he’s gone, it’s over

And I’m relieved

Because now I can focus on being a better me

So the next time a guy asks I’ll say no

Until God tells me yes