As I was falling asleep, this came to me so I had to just share. I love Korean and Chinese drama series, love them wholeheartedly. If you have never watched one, I would recommend: Strong Girl Bong-soon for Korean and Go, Go Squid for Chinese dramas, to start.

Strong Girl Bong-soon is about this woman who has a lot of strength which is passed down from the women in her family. It’s a beautiful, entertaining rom-com that I would watch over and over again. Go, Go Squid is a Chinese drama that explores the world of e-sport and this girl who falls in love with one of the legends of e-sport. E-sport for those who don’t know is basically a video game/coding competition. I am not going to give a detailed description about this one, because I could go on. Just know I went to bed at 6AM binge watching this show, for days on end.

Moving on, that’s not the main purpose behind today’s blog. Today I want to highlight this toxicity that they make cute. If you have watched these, then you already know: Boys over Flowers and Meteor Garden. They are the Korean and Chinese version of the same manga series. Both, which I will admit I did not finish watching because I couldn’t.

Let’s start with Boys over Flowers. By the way, I love Lee Min Ho, he’s just a beautiful man. However, his character is the one that I am “attacking.” The story line is that this girl who comes from a poor family, gets into this school for rich kids because the school didn’t want to look bad over an incident. She runs into the 4 “hottest” guys in school K4 and the leader of the group thinks “I’m rich so everyone is beneath me.” Obviously, when they first interact, the main lead Lee Min Ho basically bullies the girl. His friends kind of watch but don’t interfere. Due to the fact that she stands up to him, the main leads decides that he likes her. Of course, smart girl that she is, she wants nothing to do with him. Since this is a k-drama and it isn’t a k-drama without a love triangle, the girl would rather be with one of the other members of K4 because HE WAS NICE TO HER. That seems logical right, why ever would you have feelings for someone who treated you like crap? As the story goes on, we learn why the main lead acts the way he does. Two words: family trauma. Though I understand, the way the story goes, it’s almost like his behavior is excused.

It’s not! We have got to stop telling girls that he’s being mean to you because he likes you. That’s not how you like someone, that is not how you tell someone you like them. I am no psychologist, but usually when someone you don’t know like that acts a certain way towards you, it’s because they see something they wish they had. Case in point, though she didn’t have money, the main female lead was happy and comfortable. He was dealing with abandonment issues, so he was jealous. Since she didn’t act like all the other girls, screaming their head off, he appreciated her being different.

Same goes for Meteor Garden, when the main lead threw the food at her, I wanted to jump across the screen and whoop his ass. Though his terrorizing days lasted shorter then Boys over Flowers, the point still remains. Dear gents, girls, whatever you want to identify as, please, please, please understand; it is never okay to disrespect, belittle or cause pain to someone you claim to like. It’s near the category of emotional abuse. Teach yourself, teach your friends that liking/loving never equals hitting, disrespecting, belittling, bullying that person. That’s not love, that pushing your problems onto someone else and if that’s the case, go see a therapist. To re-enforce, go watch the first two episodes of each show which are available on Netflix and let me know what you think.

I won’t lie even the scenes where one of the parents is abusive to the other is just as bad, if not worst because that’s who children learn from. Granted, I am not an expert on these cultures, so I can’t say if that’s the norm or not. However, especially in the dating stage, if you see this type of behavior, get them help or walk away. The damage that has on a person is not worth it.

Ok so I’m done going off about the abuse. Now back to why I love K-drama/C-drama. They honestly put a smile on my face, to see how devoted the characters are to their partners, the resilience in the female leads. The way they approach certain topics such as mental health (watch It’s ok not to be ok – on Netflix). When I watch these shows, I get to enter a different world, where the culture is so rich, it reminds me of home. If you really want to get into Asian drama in general, I would suggest Viki.com or dramacool and of course Netflix. They have subtitles, Viki has at least 20 different language subtitles and Viki is only free with ads. Try one show and watch yourself get hooked, promise it’s worth it.