Change

Change is scary, sometimes unwanted and yet inevitable. Change can be subtle or drastic depending on the factors. Change in a relationship can either help the relationship grow or fail. You’re not the same person forever, that’s just fact. As we go through life, we experience different circumstances that switches our way of life or alter sour point of view. We learn about ourselves and like butterflies, we transpose.

For example: your first heartbreak. Here’s mine, he cheated on me because I wasn’t having sex with him. There was a level of trust, that I thought we had, that clearly wasn’t there. What I learned from my first heartbreak, be very careful who you open up yourself to and who you let into your life. Some will use you until there’s nothing left of you. Guard what is precious to you, take your time opening up to people but ALWAYS stay true to yourself.

With each step in life, you learn something new. My first relationship caused me to be cautious, after I threw caution to the wind. Kind of a contradiction, I know. What I’m saying is, there was a lot of trial and error and some really dumb decisions which helped shape who I am today.

In my current relationship, I’ve definitely grown and starting seeing things through different eyes. Mind you, the change wasn’t forced upon me but rather as we both opened up we adjusted naturally. My boyfriend and I are opposites in a lot of ways and we both see it. What makes us work is that we’re not expecting each other to change who we are. I have and still am having a hard time, exposing all my past to him while spilled it all out before we became official. Granted, it has helped me understand him more as a person and why he does or says certain things. I haven’t reached that state where I’m comfortable sharing my past. I can barely do it with myself, never mind someone I want to build a long-lasting relationship with. I’ve told him parts and pieces and summarized some bits but never a “word-vomit” (Mean Girls reference).

Anyways, I feel like I just rambled a bit, although I started writing this post two months ago a just never finished. Point is, you’re never going to get anywhere if you sit still. Change is scary but sometimes, it’s good to embrace it. You never know, the outcome might be better than you expected.

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